Mother

You wanted to party and have fun,

To play, dance, sing kareoke.

When I was a child I hardly saw you in the mornings,

You slept in from your long night’s work.

You were attracted to the trends on TV,

While I stuck to muted colors of black, grey, blue, and white.

Your social media was filled with notifications,

While mine had an occasional buzz.

You left the clothes for two weeks,

And complained when you finally had to clean the heavy load.

You bought candy from Longs,

Ate them on your bed at night while you watched the Filipino channel.

My grandma had to teach me how to be a woman,

“Your mom is hardly home and she does not teach you, so I will teach you,” my grandma said.

With her, I learned to wash dishes,

Sweep and mop the floor, cook basic foods,

Fold clothes, dust the house, wipe the counters, and more,

just about anything my mother should have taught me.

I wonder if my grandma had not been there,

that I would have been devoid of nurture completely?

While my mom partied with her friends,

All I wanted was for her to stay home and be my mother,

To care for her home and her family,

To make sure things were running smoothly,

To stroke my hair when I was hurt,

To wait on me when I was sick.

Why did my mother think she could do whatever she wanted?

I didn’t have to read a bible to know a woman’s place.
Now that she visits church with me,

she’s stopped trying to be the “cool mom,”

She bakes me pastries and sandwiches ,

She cleans without a frown on her face,

No longer nags but helps the home run smoothly,

She was deprived of God, 

But now that she learns she can finally help me.

All These Pretty Things

Fruity pebbles, flowers, bohemian dresses, calligraphy,

I still don’t know what this means.

How did we get this far, to make Jesus a product?

Rather than educating people,

We throw out bible verses

as if that’s the only thing useful.

Seems as if Christians look the same on social media,

Acting the same, dressing the same, content is the same.

Daily dose of inspiration, cool bible verses, pastel colors, cute outfits,

Am I the only one that thinks we lost the real meaning?

Jesus isn’t that simple,

It’s a relationship that we should seek.

It’s a relationship full of everything on the spectrum.

Happiness, anger, sorrow, shame,

He sees us for all that we are.

The word saves, but tell me what the word means.

Don’t hide behind pretty things,

Tell me something real.

Finding Love

How do I love in this world? How can I manage to love unconditionally in a place that is not heaven? I suppose the only way I can answer that is that it was never about me. There is nothing I can do to prove my worthiness to God. I became Christian because I no longer wanted to live for myself. I was tired of fighting of nothing. There was something greater than me that had to be worth it and he found me. He was the love that knew how to love me fully. You love unconditionally because he loves you that way. You are the shining example of love that reflects others back to him. It was never about ourselves; it was all about him. Love is forever, the only thing that stands the test of time. Have faith, hope, and love. The greatest of these is love.

Appearances

Stop putting so much emphasis on looks,

it isn’t all that.

What’s going on in your head?

I bet you know something.

Look past the designer shades, plastered makeup face,

salon manicured nails, towering heels,

logo inscribed handbag, extra polished clothing.

Appearance isn’t a skill.

If you insist on the importance of appearance,

perhaps your heart is in design?

Everyone’s good for something,

don’t let them convince you otherwise.

There are lots of wonderful things to do,

don’t waste your time on insignificant things.

You’re more than stuff,

You’re a human being.

The media is noise, something hard to ignore,

But truth will always be golden.

You’ve got a God-given talent that can change the world,

unique to you, yourself, and you.

Perhaps you’re socially gifted, a flexible dancer,

a detailed mechanic, a number cruncher,

a knowledgable fact checker, a strategic gamer,

a convincing salesperson, a great photographer,

a musically inclined individual, an imaginative storyteller,

a strong weightlifter, or the most efficient homemaker.

Everybody’s got something and if you don’t,

you just haven’t found it yet.

Forget the “look,” but take good care of yourself.

If you have dry hair, put oil,

if you sweat often, change your shirts more often.

Be who you want to be, but be a good person too.

A smile helps in many ways,

It brightens up yourself and the room you’re in.

Bring out your best features,

Don’t fool yourself with what you don’t have.

There are too many things in the world to distract you.

Society will give you fast food, reality TV,

drugs, shopping malls, fast cars,

but these prevent you from changing the world.

Guard your heart, for whatever you do flows from it,

Know that only the mediocre choose to conceal with appearances.

It is hard being a girl,

to be constantly judged and attacked for what you look like,

but hold tight to your identity in Christ,

he knows you better than anyone.

Stick to your guns,

be humble, be strong,

Your value is immeasurable in the eyes of Him.

 

Be in the Present

The arrows that pierce

through your heart

reek the blessings that promise

enormous joy and peace

How distracting is the past and future

tricking us into casting

our hope right before

good things flourish

Struggle is real

pain is evident but time

does not catch its breath because

of your cries

Hand of time flows continuously

we must catch the favors

when they come at us

for the givers are never

left unrewarded

Lose Your Life and Find It

I dreamed of being buried underground. I was aware of my fate, confident in what had to be done. Everyone tried to talk me out of it. My teachers, my family, influential adults in my life. I told them I knew what needed to be done. “You’re going to die, don’t you know?” they all asked. I nodded because I knew. I walked to a woman who injected a heart slowing serum in my arm and I could feel my heart slowing. “This is it,” she led me to my grave, “this spot’s just for you.” Before being buried under to meet my fate, my love said he’d stay with me every step of the way. He was different from everyone else. He knew that I would be safe too. The dirt fell above me and he’d speak to me like he always had. I knew I would be alright, that I wasn’t going to die.